My membership for a particular organization was due to expire. I thanked them for their friendly reminder email, telling them I was not sure of the exact date that my membership would be up. Their response was:
Our records show that a hard copy of a letter was sent to you on March 5, 2011 to inform you that you were to expire in 90 days. It was never returned to us.
This immediately threw me back to my grade school days when I, in vain, tried to explain to the nuns why I could not understand the chapters in the textbook well enough to complete the homework assignment. You know, the sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach that tells you indeed you are going to fail and to fail miserably, and getting chastised in front of the entire class. Afterwards, the class would tease me mercilessly ….
Fast forward to today … if I read between the lines, did they [also] call me a liar? Are they telling me that I did indeed receive their hardcopy letter? Much like the nun telling me that I didn’t even try to understand the importance of some minor battle in the Civil War.
This is a great example of how email messages can be misconstrued, taken out of context and begin feelings of irritation and resentment.
Rationally I don’t believe the writer intended for her words to come across as harsh as they did. I felt her index finger jab my chest. I felt my defenses rise — I felt my credibility and my reputation being attacked. My caveman brain wanted to take over and fight for my own self-esteem. Luckily I took a deep breath and my rational mind took over.
It wasn’t what she wrote, it was what I thought I read.
