Every action has two sides … one side faces the sun and the other faces darkness. If you are facing the darkness, you remain in the past.  Being chained to the past keeps negative feelings churning ….. remorse, jealousy, revenge, guilt …. variations of three of your (more…)

Shari gives an enlightening break out session at Cessna Pilot Center Conference on the importance to flight instructors of emotional intelligence and relating well to your students.  Every session given so far has been enthusiastically embraced.

Each side of our brain can succumb to overwhelm. And there are two distinctly different ways to overcome overwhelm.

Your left brain is your logical brain, your analytical and logical thought,

along with your math and science skills reside here.  Your left brain works most efficiently when it is naming and categorizing, or when dealing with the 3 R’s [reading, writing, arithmetic].  Information is managed in sequential manner.

Your right brain is your creative brain, your intuition, creativity and art and music sensors come from this side.  Your right brain whirls when it encounters opportunities to use imagination and non-verbal information.  Information does not have to be in any sort of pattern.

When you are left-brained overwhelmed [too much work to do in too little time], you are spinning in a logical quagmire.  The best thing to do is to unleash your creative side:  color [outside the lines], sing, dance, exercise …. any activity that you don’t really have to ‘think’ to do.

When you are right-brained overwhelmed, review multiplication tables in your head!  That’ll quickly get your left brain engaged so your right brain can take a breather.

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The New Mexico Business Weekly had an interesting article. It stated that research has shown that knowing someone’s natural behavioral style how they act and react in situations will help you match them to the position that will keep them engaged. And we know what happens when employees are engaged: (more…)

Do you remember getting up this morning and getting ready for work?  Showering, brushing your teeth, fixing your breakfast, driving to work?  If you are like most people, you put our brain on ‘automatic pilot’ and just do these things.  I know I have often driving to work and not (more…)

Inter-team conflict will never go away.  One of the basics that needs to be discussed among the team members is “How do you feel about conflict?”  Is conflict neutral?  or does it cause emotions to run high?  I contend that it is our perception of conflict that rules our response to it. 

In my seminars on communication styles, emotional intelligence skills at work and how your brain deals with people’s behavior, we discuss and dialogue this exact question.  Some behavior dimensions don’t see conflict as anything other than normal everyday living. They thrive on it and need to be ‘the winner’. Others will avoid conflict at all costs … they will adapt and adjust to situations rather than state disagreement or disapproval.

So how do you handle the person that enjoys dealing with conflict? Generally speaking, do not back down. These behaviors are indicative of someone who enjoys perceived power and/or who has a strong personality. For those people that avoid conflict, talking in a non-abrasive and more empathetic way will be helpful in working out the dissention.

More details and information can be found on my website, bringing this seminar in-house, or by calling Shari.

Remember it isn’t what you said, it’s what they think they heard”

How much of your motivation is emotional?  And how much is based on your logical, objective needs? Every decision we make is made from an emotional base, and we justify with our logical prowess.  When we spend money, it gives us a high.  The more we spend and the larger (more…)

True or false:  The more you pay people to work, the less they feel obligated to look for another job. Studies have shown that this is both true and false.  If you pay your people well, there’s a good chance they will stay.  The question then becomes: 

Do you want them to stay?   

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I’m watching the 1957 movie “12 Angry Men“. The original featured a stellar cast of Henry Fonda, E.G. Marshall, Jack Warden and Martin Balsam. If you have never seen this movie [the original is better than the remake, both are worth seeing], I highly recommend you watch it. It’s only about 90 minutes long and is an excellent lesson in breaking out of the box thinking. Henry Fonda, Juror #8, does not believe the young man accused of murdering his father is guilty. He is not certain the (more…)

I recently took an emotional intelligence assessment on-line. It was interesting, as many of them are. I had challenges answering three questions:

I get bored with many activities and hobbies

Now does this mean that I get bored if I have many activities and hobbies underway simultaneously? Or I get bored with a large number of activities and hobbies; in other words, not many activities and hobbies can hold my attention? The ambiguous word here is ‘many’. What number constitutes ‘many’?

I use free time to learn things that might be useful in the future

Here the ambiguous word is not ‘might’, it’s ‘useful’. Useful for what? The future. That is a very broad word. I had someone tell me that in Stephen Covey’s 2 x 2 model [important / not important / urgent / not urgent] that nothing she did was in the not important / not urgent quadrant. Even when (more…)